My soul has been restless. I have been struggling with feeling stagnant in my brain recovery and in our dreams. I asked the Lord a number of times for His help. I asked for help financially towards my therapy or mortgage goals. I asked for guidance spiritually. I laid all my dreams back down before Him and said, “whatever Your will is Lord, I am here and I am willing.”
When we ask these things, we need to have our spiritual eyes looking for what He will do next. We can be expectant for God to work if we genuinely have willing hearts to learn and do as He asks.
These prayers have been repetitious for months. I see little glimpses of hope and Him moving, and then I feel like it fades away again. I liken it to a surfer waiting for the right swell. She looks out on the horizon and rides the little waves that come. But her heart holds on for that “big bomb out the back”.
I’ve been watching the Lord work through my spiritual request. The Holy Spirit convicted my heart to forgive people I’ve held bitterness towards for years. He’s brought healing to a deep and old wound I didn’t know was still affecting me. When the healing came, I almost fought it at first denying that it was bothering me. Then, when I realized it still was, I wept. I cried in praise for the weight lifted from my heavy heart as I accepted the healing He was offering.
I have watched the Lord answer my prayers, some from decades ago. He’s “creating a clean heart within me” (Psalm 51:10). I am so grateful.
I don’t like to admit this, but I am one that often needs encouragement. I wouldn’t say I’m a “words of affirmation” person (The Five Love Languages), but a little “great job” here and there keeps me going. I feel like the Lord has been whispering this upon me often lately as I look to Him for direction and counsel.
All of these things that the LORD is doing are wonderful and appreciated. I am truly grateful. These have been little waves that have kept me going and enjoying the ride.
Michael’s birthday was on Thursday. I prayed that morning that the Lord would “bless him and keep him; That the Lord would make His face to shine upon him and be gracious to him; that the Lord would lift up His countenance upon him and give him peace.” (Numbers 6:24-26). I never would have imagined what that prayer of blessing would translate to.
Michael worked that day. I prepared my surprise for him with the help of our friend. I was so excited to show him. Our friend and I worked hard to get it done. We finished just in time (you’ll have to wait until Thursday to find out what it was).
Anyways, our friend left so I could celebrate and have a moment with Michael when he got home. He mentioned he would return later with a little surprise for Michael’s birthday. I thought he was crazy, since him helping was a great gift unto itself.
But, he and his fiancée came around 5:30p.m. They asked us to sit down and mentioned that they had a surprise for both Michael and I.
Michael and I have worked hard the past few years to pay off our mortgage. Then, we found an opportunity that would help my brain recovery. I could get vision therapy. It would mean going every week for a year to therapy appointments. But the doctor confirmed to us by previous similar case studies that he could pretty much get me back to normal by doing it. We walked away feeling completely confident this is what we needed to pursue.
However, there was a hefty price tag involved. Since the therapy was out of town, we factored in gas, coffee or lunch for those driving me, along with the therapy and doctor’s appointments. In total, it would cost around $10,000.
We weighed the options. Continue trying to pay off our mortgage or put it all into therapy. We decided it was worth the try. Getting better would mean greater functioning of life, marriage, and enjoyment. So, we pretty much put the rest of life on hold for now.
When our friends found out, they were moved with compassion and generosity. They told us on Michael’s birthday that they had started a Go Fund Me account to help pay for my therapy. They had been working on it, along with friends and family, for a couple of months. They were able to gather $5,000!
At first, they were excited yet disappointed. They wanted it to be the full amount. Michael and I were dumbfounded. We didn’t know what to say. Tears of relief, joy, shock, and gratitude poured out of me. I couldn’t believe what they had done.
As they left our house, Michael and I fell to the floor and wept. We worshipped, praised, and thanked the Lord for answering our prayers and caring so deeply for us. We don’t deserve it, yet we are so grateful. We are grateful for amazing friends and family that contributed. We are grateful for the people in our lives that we are so richly blessed with. We are grateful for these dear friends of ours that thought to do this for us and bless us in this way.
I calculated everything later that night. Since I can’t physically go to therapy due to COVID, the clinic switched to online sessions. This has saved the travel expenses. Because of this, plus the money we had already saved, the gift of $5,000 was exactly what we needed to cover the cost for the rest of the year!
God is so good and so faithful. He listens to our every prayer. He cares for our every need. His timing is always perfect.
A friend had inspired me with the idea to make a testimony page on my website. I loved it! So, I would like to begin with it now. If you have a story of God’s work in your life, I would love for you to share that with me. Send it to my email at in**@ho******************.org. I will share it on my website. I am often most inspired by hearing the Lord’s work in others’ lives. It gives us community, inspiration, and helps us persevere in our own trials. Let’s share what we are learning, how we are growing, and how the Lord is working across our world
